Recap by S_D

If you want to read the normal Ross Report, which is much more naked without my rantings, go here [wwe.com].

Greetings from under the black 200X Resistol hat from an Oklahoma Sooner fan who seems to be busier these days than a fruit merchant!

Anyone out there know what the hell a fruit merchant does? And why he would be so busy? Maybe that’s just another cryptic message to Big Show's fat ass or something.

Random thoughts, opinion and some basically useless information...

You forgot the occasional gay bashing.

Thought-provoking week of TV with RAW showing some improvement from last week's broadcast but still not receiving the rave reviews all involved would like to see. We seem to still be searching for the correct balance between steak and sizzle, in-ring action/competition and backstage vignettes/talking. The program needs both primary elements to be successful and finding the balance between the two is a challenge. It is certainly easy to tear a show apart after the fact, and we all do it to some degree; however, I assure each and every one of you that every person involved in the process is working as diligently as possible to get back in a groove and put a string of hot shows together. Don't know quite what to expect from Iowa State on Monday night live on the new TNN but I do know that a loud and enthusiastic crowd would be music to our ears.

Better than last week? Sorry J.R., but even more HHH cock-riding does not make the show better than last week. They were both steaming piles of shit. And they smelled THE SAME. And actually, the real balance that the WWE needs to find is between the amount of time HHH is on TV and the amount of time HHH is not on TV. I can safely say that the correct balance is “Never on TV”. That would be music to MY ears.

The largely post-produced SmackDown! show was another solid effort in my view, even though some viewers did not like the sizzle aspect of a portion of the show via the Billy and Chuck segment. Obviously, everyone can't always be happy with all the content of any TV show but, by and large, SmackDown! was an overall enjoyable program to watch. Tuesday's SmackDown! taping in Minneapolis will be closely watched by a variety of critics due to the commitment ceremony of Billy and Chuck, and from what I have heard, SmackDown! should be a super show.

Yeah, J.R. Believe it or not, but there are people out there who don’t like gay people. Quite a view of them actually. Commitment ceremony? Same-Sex relations? Good Lord you guys, just say “wedding” and “gay” al-fucking-ready. You’ve beaten the PTC, what’s there to worry about?

Don't have the exact numbers for SummerSlam, but from what I am told it did well. It would be hard to pick that show apart, even though some tried. From where I sit, it was a helluva wrestling event.

I sure as hell didn’t try to pick it apart. SummerSlam was without a doubt the best PPV of the year. Too bad they followed it up with two AWFUL RAW’s that were very easily picked apart. One by yours truly.

Speaking of wrong information, I was told early this week while I was on the road that Internet sites were reporting that World Wrestling Entertainment was in serious negotiations with Scott Steiner, which is absolutely and totally false. Our office has had zero conversations with Scott in quite some time, even though it was reported that "sources backstage at RAW" were talking about it. I assume that some folks could have been speculating about Steiner's future; however, I can assure you that we have had no conversations with him and have no plans to do so at this time. My department handles these negotiations and none have taken place. Someone's "sources" were wrong on this one.

Translation: We have been begging Scott Steiner 5 times a day to come and work for us. Good try J.R. And sources deep within J.R.’s motherboard say to expect Jim Ross vs. Dave Scherer for WMX-9.

Regarding Bill Goldberg, we have nothing new to report as Billy and his agents, managers, etc., know of our interest; however, we have no meetings scheduled to discuss his future with WWE at this time. We are continuing with our long-term planning without Bill in our plans simply because we do not know of his exact interest in our company and what he wants from our business in the future. Bill is a very unique talent who I am sure has definite plans in mind for his future, and we will continue to prepare for life without Goldberg as we have to this point.

Fag weddings aren’t gonna interest Goldberg in joining. And what the hell J.R., Goldberg has made it very clear what his interest is in your company: None.

Unless plans change, I do not expect to see The Rock back in a WWE ring until after the first of the year due to his movie commitment. Contrary to what has been published, The Rock has no firm deal for his third movie project at this time and I feel comfortable in saying that he will be aggressively back in the creative mix as we prepare for WrestleMania, which is set for March 30, 2003.

The Rock needs to pick one profession or the other. Stop dangling both before everyone follows the example lead by the Uniondale Coliseum and boos the hell out of you.

I am often asked about Stone Cold Steve Austin and the possibility of him returning to WWE. Bottom line, to borrow a phrase from the Texas Rattlesnake, is that there are no plans for Austin to return to the company at this time and that he seems to be more interested in handling and resolving personal matters in San Antonio than anything else. Once those are addressed, I suppose anything is possible. We learn early on in this business to say "never say never." Your guess is just as good as mine on this one. I have my own personal feelings on this issue and for now they will stay that way. I will say this, however: be very leery of what you might read about this matter, especially if it starts out as "sources say" or "backstage talk was ... "

However, Austin DID enter himself in the 2003 Royal Rumble the night after the 2002 Royal Rumble. So he’ll be back then.

Also read about the alleged "competition" between the RAW and the SmackDown! writing staffs, wrestlers, announcers, etc., as if they were on totally separate agendas with one another and with one wishing that the other to not do well, second-guessing each other, etc. I seriously doubt that this matter has evolved or degenerated, if you will, to this level, but if it is heading that way it should be abruptly ceased or those guilty should be eliminated from the entire process. Personally speaking, I certainly want the program I perform on, RAW, to do well, but I don't think I am so stupid or insecure that I want RAW to do better than SmackDown! at the expense of WWE in general. Yes, there is real competition between the brands and competition is a good thing for all involved; however, we would all have to be egomaniacal morons to want one show to be great and for the other to suck. Last I looked, all of us were being paid by WWE no matter if we performed on RAW or SmackDown! Everyone who works for this company, no matter their role, should have only one goal in mind and that is to consistently and totally entertain our fans and make them happy with everything we do.

Uhm, wasn’t the WHOLE POINT of this fucking brand extension to create a “competition-like” atmosphere that would make people give a shit again?

I really enjoyed attending the opening of the new Danny Davis Arena in Louisville, Ky., Wednesday night. The building has a capacity of about 400 and approximately 1,500 fans were turned away from the inaugural event. WWE Confidential will be producing a feature on the facility and the developmental program in the future. No one I know works harder at helping these young kids than Danny Davis, Jim Cornette and company. These young men and women learn the fundamentals of our business, including basic in-ring skills and interview techniques, etc., but they also learn so much more. Each student is challenged to learn the history of our business, including watching videotapes of some of the business' all-time greats, the sacrifices it takes to get to the promised land, to come to work on time everyday ready to give 100 percent effort and to be wholeheartedly concerned about totally entertaining the audience. If they are fortunate to get to WWE, they will be taught some "sizzle" to go along with the all-important "steak" they are learning in Ohio Valley Wrestling. It was a great night and will air as a two-hour special in Louisville this Saturday night on the WB affiliate there. Check out OVWrestling.com for more info on our developmental area and how to obtain tapes of their weekly TV shows, featuring the future stars of WWE. Great effort by all involved in the ring, and I especially enjoyed the two main events -- Nova vs. John Cena and Chris Benoit vs. Doug Basham. Not one talent on the entire event lay on their backside, and that's quite frankly where it all starts. We have some outstanding prospects in Louisville and, with the exception of next week, Sept. 11, we tape each Wednesday night in Louisville. Again, check out their Web site for more information. My thanks to the OVW alumni who attended, including WWE Champion Brock Lesnar, Rico, Mark Henry, Randy Orton, Shelton Benjamin, John Cena, and Victoria.

Sure he’ll thank you, but you’re still not getting past Heat\Velocity.

Injury update:

Oh boy!

Undertaker hyperextended his elbow, has been fitted with a brace, is working through the pain and is not expected to miss any bookings. I know I have said this many times before, but this is one very tough human being who continues to pay the price to lead our locker room. The SmackDown! talents are very fortunate to have the benefit of his leadership.

C’Mon Undertaker, can’t you miss one booking? And make it a SmackDown! TV Taping? PLEEEEEEEEAAAASSSSSEEEEEEE?

Sean O'Haire re-aggravated his groin pull Wednesday night in Louisville and had an MRI done. The results indicated a tear, which will put him on the shelf for approximately six weeks. Sean will not need surgery and is expected to be just fine with the six weeks rest. Sean has demonstrated excellent progress in recent weeks. He is a very good athlete and is beginning to understand the mental aspect of this complex business.

Damn it, why can’t HHH or UT get these injuries? Oh that’s right, they don’t do anything to put them in danger. Lazy fucks. Kevin Nash puts his body on the line more than these guys.
Mark Henry sprained his ankle in Louisville on Wednesday, but it was a mild sprain and he feels he can work through the discomfort.

I feel he’s wrong and will break that ankle. Then, I feel I will cheer very loudly.

Chris Nowinski got hit in the mouth a few weeks ago and is having some problems with his jaw.

Insert your own jokes here. After all, J.R. didn’t say what hit him in the mouth. Damn that Bradshaw.

Rosie is improving from his hip flexor and gets a little better each day.

Hip flexor? What the fuck is that? And has Suzanne Somers ever done an infomercial for it?

Rhyno has been cleared to begin very light workouts in the ring at less than half speed. November is still the target month for his return from neck surgery.

November…I’m expecting HHH to have already unified the titles by then. Because he’s THAT DAMN GOOD!...at fucking the head writer.

Kanyon is continuing with his therapy and light workouts after his shoulder injury and severe infection, and he will see his doctor again on Sept. 10 to get an indication as to when he might be able to resume his career.

The gods of the glass ceiling can’t keep Kanyon out for much longer. He’s already been out for a damned year.

Maven is expected to miss six more weeks while his ankle heals.

Hurry back, Maven. We need to make the Undertaker look like a pussy again, because odds are, he won’t let Brock do it.

Kevin Nash continues his therapy in Birmingham, Ala., for his torn quadriceps muscle.

I wonder when we get the Kevin Nash Desire video. And have it played 600,000 times like HHH’s was.

Jazz sees her doctor next week to hopefully be released and to be able to get back in the ring and begin training and conditioning. Surgery to repair her torn ACL was on May 16 and she was expected to be out up to six months.

Thank God.

Eric Angle has been released from doctor's care after biceps surgery and has returned to OVW to resume his in-ring training. Eric is starting from scratch and has a long and challenging journey ahead of him.

That whole injury was karma trying to tell you Eric that you will never ever compare to your brother. Give it up.

All other injured WWE Superstars are progressing very well and on target as previously outlined here over the past few weeks.

Really? Wow. Jerry Lynn’s knee sure is taking a damn long time to heal. J.R. still has yet to update us specifically about his injury.

Maven, Nidia, Chris Nowinski, Jackie Gayda and Linda Miles will all be taping episodes of "Blind Date" in Los Angeles in the next couple of weeks.

I wonder how many spots Jackie will blow in that one.

Speaking of Linda Miles, she may be the most physically gifted female athlete I have ever seen in our business. If she ever picks up the mental side of the game, she could be truly awesome.

Why the FUCK was she even allowed to MAKE IT TO THE TOP 25 if she never had the mental side already?

Ric Flair will be in Little Rock, Ark., on Saturday, Sept. 28 to kick off ticket sales for October's No Mercy Pay-Per-View event.

And he’ll still job to whoever needs it. Unless it’s Jericho, because HHH won’t have that! Nope!

We may have some good news very soon on the BBQ Sauce front.

No way! He’s gotten his sperm out of the recipe? Well, Raven will sure be disappointed.

I had a great weekend last week in my home state of Oklahoma attending the OU-Tulsa football game Friday night at Skelly Stadium in Tulsa. My thanks to the University of Tulsa for the sideline pass, as it was great seeing old friends and WWE fans. Loved meeting many fans in the OU band along with some of the Sooner footballers, too. Tulsa had an awesome team effort the first half before running out of steam against the powerful Sooners, who finally got it going in the second half. This week it is OU versus Alabama in Norman, which I feel will be a helluva ballgame between two of America's great football institutions. Oklahoma is favored by 12, or so I hear, but it will be closer than that from where I sit.

College football sucks ass.

Take care and have a great weekend, and I will hopefully see you Monday night from Iowa State on RAW!
J.R. (BOOMER SOONER!)

Bleh, I’m going to eat Burger King.

S_D, EFNet #Wrestling

©WrestlingDB, 2002.

Last Edited: Friday, September 6th, 2002 - 08:03 pm EDT